♥ Sunday, December 2, 2007
@3:56 AM
Another yet so heartbreaking night,finally i breakdown after such a long hold on to my words.I broke you heart,& now u broke my.your leaving is still killing me, silly me have thoughts of leaving everyone, making you regert, walk my life with revenge. sorry,i apologise.Called jacinta a few hrs ago, cried on the phone, i can't speak a word, i never felt so sad before, its my fault.will you forgive me please.Elisa thanks for all the concern and words,milk does help,but only for a moment.Im living my life with guilty and shame,i dont know why. Is leaving is a reason to be free from everything, i will. Israel, i never felt this way before,im so sorry for what i've done,it all starts with jealousy,temptation leads me to more and more mistake,i know i hurt u deeply,& i know nothing can mend your broken heart anymore,but will give me one last chance to mend everything. Im throwing my pride for you,i dont mind begging for you to come back. At lest let me tried to mend this back.I didnt know you leaving can me so hard impact on me. I've lost. sorry for all the dying and crying, if i treasure my life will you come back? help me somebody, im dying, im so away from everything, why dont you people come and help me. I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house .That don’t bother meI can take a few tears now and then and just let them outI’m not afraid to cry every once in a whileEven though going on with you gone still upsets me There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok But that’s not what gets me What hurts the most Was being so close And having so much to say And watching you walk away And never knowing What could have beenAnd not seeing that loving you Is what I was tryin’ to doIt’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go But I’m doin’ It It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone Still Harder Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regretBut I know if I could do it over I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart That I left unspokenI'll be waiting. thanks marrisa's mum, your words woke me up.(:
